Counter-counter-counter-rally announced to protest counter-counter-rally

protest123Asheville, Monday — A series of escalating rallies and proposed counter-rallies regarding police brutality toward minorities has prompted community organizers to announce a new event, Asheville Rally Slam.

“This is an event for those of us who want to see an end to police brutality, or who want to see an end to our rally against police brutality, or who want to see an end to the rally against our rally against police brutality,” said organizer Devon Glover. “Finding dates and times for our own rallies, as well as rallies against counter-rallies, has been a scheduling nightmare so we’re going to do it all this Saturday.”

Glover encourages attendance for those who wish to end the culture of police brutality, as well as those who want to support brutal or even non-brutal police officers, and especially those who would like people who support brutal or non-brutal police officers to shut up.

Members of any group who would like to protest or counter-protest against any other group or protest are encouraged to attend Asheville Rally Slam.

“If you’re on the fence, or don’t even understand the issues involved, come on out anyhow and shop around for a rally that fits your taste,” said Glover.

Organizers for the various rallies will be handing out literature about their rallies, and many ralliers will offer a succinct thumbnail sketch of their rallies’ causes on easy-to-read cardboard signs. For those who don’t like to read, there will be public chants and battle-cries to help you learn which rally you should rally behind.

“I’m excited about Rally Slam this Saturday,” said one Asheville resident who was enjoying a lunch break downtown. “I will probably find the smallest rally of the bunch to support, because it seems like a tiny rally needs a lot more support and rallying than a really big rally.”